Many people have told me that online dating could be a great solution for me. The logic is sound. I spend a lot of time away from home, and most of my free-time activities are not the greatest for meeting new, single people. So finding available, compatible people using the internet sounds great. I could do it on my own time, and I could skip the pickup stage.
As I said, the logic is sound. That, coupled with crushing loneliness (I exaggerate) has convinced me to try online dating on several different occasions. Actually the most recent time I tried it was due to sheer boredom. I was stuck at a site, away from home and almost all my days were standby. So what better to do than peruse matches. But that is a different story.
I have tried a few different sites, and tried at a few different times. All in all it has not been very successful for me. I have found that free sites are heavily geared towards random hookups, and seemed much shadier. After a while I decided to try a site with a paid membership. This site had an overall better experience, but I grew tired of it after a while for several reasons.
The site did help me get a few dates, and I met a few interesting women, but in the end I think we were just going through the motions. I know some people who have had great success on this site, and at least one couple who met through it, and are now married with a child. So I am not trying to say these sites don't work. I just don't think they work for me.
The basic method of the sites are that you fill out your profile, and lengthy questionnaire. Then computers use this information to discover your compatibility, and matches you to "compatible" people. All at once this process works too well, and not at all. When I say "not at all" I mean that the majority of my matches did not seem overly interesting to me. And when I say it "works too well" I mean that the majority of my matches were carbon copies of each other. If there weren't pictures I would swear there were 5 women out there with 500 profiles!
This made me a little jaded about the whole thing. It made me wonder if the general population is actually that bland, or if these women are just afraid to actually say something original. Based on all the profiles there are only about three books being published today. How can no one read anything outside those three books! Are they trying to fit into a mold, and say all the right things? I am sure the men do it too.
Maybe it's the reason I don't get a lot of responses. I talk about liking video games, and going to comic conventions, and reading science fiction, skiing in the mountains, and seeing live music. I try to show a bit of myself. But I find that most of my matches "like to travel" and "go for drinks with friends". And that's about it. I have even tried re-doing my personality profile, but to no avail. So with the abundance of generic profiles I find myself reverting to the basics of "hot or not", which isn't a good basis for a relationship.
My last gripe is that when you sign up you get a bunch of new matches, which is great. But then there is barely anything new coming in for the rest of your 3-month membership. Then as soon as your membership expires, you get loads and loads of new matches everyday. As well as "offers" to sign back up and "find happiness (TM)".
So to finish my little rant. The sites seem dishonest in their intentions. And most of the people seem dishonest about themselves; "I do the cool kids stuff, I read the cool kid books, I am a cool kid too". But you are all exactly the same. If I wanted Ms. Generic I probably wouldn't be single. So I have grown tired of the online dating scene, as it seems to have removed the human element. Everyone seems like a robot, with a human face (and not in a sexy Cylon sort of way).